Thursday, May 15, 2008

Said "Californy is the place you oughta be....."

so they loaded up the truck
and they moved to Beverly
... Hills, that is.
... swimming pools
... movie stars

and now


(unless you've been living under a rock, you've heard that today the California Supreme Court struck down the referendum which defined marriage as being only between a man and a woman)

Jane Hathaway would've been thrilled. At long last she could've popped the question to the object of her affection... Ellie Mae.

And I could've popped the question to the object of mine... Jethro Bodine.

Actually, I could've popped the question years ago to several likely candidates in Los Angeles. But no, not me. I had to pick the most emotionally unavailable human poseur it was ever my misfortune to encounter in an internet chat room. To be honest it wasn't all his fault. I threw my heart at him, while it was still freshly broken from a 15 year relationship that went "kaput" one day. And I fell all over him when he showed a fair amount of interest in me.

But the moment I found out he was a science fiction writer warning bells should've gone off in my head. Writers, even semi-famous ones, are always looking for a handout and a sugar-daddy to take care of mundane matters such as, oh, cash.

We were doomed from the outset. I had a couple of bucks, but we ran through that real fast.

Of course, I'd always been doomed from the outset with all my love interests over the years. Either they were way too sane for me (crush #1 and lover #1) or way too psychotic (crush #2 and lover's #2 and #3) and whatever you'd care to call the writer. Words like "sociopathic" come to mind.

It was always something, but to be honest, lover #1 was hot, considerate, loving, gentle and the blondest blonde (to the point of golden white ... everywhere) I'd ever met. And it was a romantic meeting. Our eyes, literally, met across a crowded dance floor. Well, after three months of that normality I was going nuts (... nuttier than usual). I dropped him like a hot potato. He even showed up, three months later, begging me to reconsider. And once again I foolishly threw the baby out with the bathwater.

What a stupid, self-centered nit I was.

My point, if I have one, is that it's all well and good for everyone to get the "right" to be married to persons of the same sex, but we need to face the fact that gays are just as likely to have their marriages explode in their faces as straight people are.

And I know from whence I speak. Would having had a full-blown marriage made any difference to me in those relationships many years ago? I doubt it. I'm not optimistic regarding my own chances for wedded, same-sex, bliss.

That sort of thing only happens in fairy tales, when the Princess knows a good thing when she sees it.

Unlike me.


Bev Sykes said...

hey, Honey, "equal rights" means not only equal rights to the same rights that marriage conveys, but equal rights to make an idiot of yourself, just like the straight folks (something I know a bit about myself).

Just remember that every experience, the good and the bad, have brought you to where you are now, and without the good and the bad you might be quite a different person, or your might actually be dead.

Someone once told me that you just take things one day at a time, and to let go and let god.

Hmmm...wonder who that was....?

JoyZeeBoy said...

Oh, I was just throwing myself a little pity-party yesterday. Of course I'm delighted with the court's decision.

I'm just sayin' that the word "marriage" wouldn't have meant much to me in my salad days, primarily because I had such crappy examples around me in my childhood (mommy did go through 4 or 5 husbands before she finally gave up -- so far I'm drawing the line at 3).

Which is not to say that I wouldn't give it a shot, one more time, if the right opportunity came along.