Look, I promise I'll finish it tonight. I did read an entire chapter last night. Honest to Godric Gryffindor!
Here's what I think is happening. I go to bed and read a chapter. Then I fall asleep. Sometime, in the middle of the night, Jo Rowling (that enchantress), sneaks into my bedroom and whisks my copy of HP&TDH away to a secret bindery, not far away. There they carefully break the binding on my book, install another sheath of papers representing another 3-4 chapters, rebind it and she sneaks it back under my bed, just seconds before the alarm goes off.
It's obviously a plot to make me look like I'm a slow reader, which I'm not. What were we talking about?
Oh, yes, they convicted Padilla of something, probably of thinking or saying evil things about Vice President Darth Voldemort or President Fake Southern Drunken Fratboy Who's Really a Spoiled-Rotten Ivy-League New England Preppie and Guard Deserting Drunken Fratboy -- and don't laugh, we're all next!
And I have one question. A half a trillion dollars, over 3,000 American military casualties and 4 years of war in two foreign nations have gotten us exactly what?
WHERE IS OSAMA MR. PRESIDENT?
Here's what I think. Every night we get close to ending the war. Then Fratboy falls asleep, and that bitch, the Veep, sneaks into his room and adds another six months of war to his presidency.
I can totally relate. I'll never finish the book. And you can
BET YOUR BOTTOM DOLLAR THAT GEORGE W. BUSH WILL NEVER FINISH THE WAR IN IRAQ.
Note to the NSA data miners. This concludes our broadcast for today. We hope you have enjoyed our program and will join us again tomorrow. Have a pleasant evening everyone.